so my family moved the entire move up and I’m freaking out now that we’re probably leaving Christmas day instead of New Year’s Eve.
nbd

it’s just my entire 25 years of life I’m packing up and saying goodbye to in the next three days.

yeah it was mostly crappy

but still

my family will probably never all be in the same place together again. I’ll never see this house again (which I’m actually glad of but it’s just weird). I’m leaving any last shred of stability and safety behind at the same time that I’m realizing that it never existed to begin with. Everything I was ever taught about love and family and purpose was based on lies and I am not sure how to process that yet.

So much is unknown and I have no safety net. If things go wrong…if I can’t afford this, if I get too sick to function…I’m one step away from being a mentally disabled homeless person.

Considering last year at this time, we were all enjoying a family vacation and making empty promises to always be there for each other…this is a bit of a shock to the system.