lizardbeans:

kaijutegu:

the-love-of-snakes:

the-long-dog:

the-love-of-snakes:

How DARE you like an animal that is not fluffy! I’ll have you know I was EATEN by a snake once and I DIED

You know my mom’s uncle’s cousin’s grandma’s dry cleaner’s friend’s sister once had a snake that started lying next to her every night to measure her up to eat her. 

In fact, my grandma’s neighbor’s sister’s best friend’s FATHER was CONSUMED by his PYTHON that STOPPED EATING just so it could make room for a BIG MEAL. Who’s to say your ball PYTHON won’t eat ME?!? I DIED from a ball python eating ME. How dare you like a snake that eats people like me

I was told in all seriousness once that my “dangerous boa was going to eat me and I should never let him stretch alongside of me because he’s measuring me to see if I fit in his mouth.”

My boa is a sand boa.

He’s ten inches long.

My brother in law also thought said 10 inch boa could kill people by strangling them. Death necklace

I’m pretty sure my aunt, my dad’s best friend’s daughter, and several other people were convinced that my juvenile milksnake (in an enclosure in the basement where no one but me would have to see or interact with him, and no bigger around than my finger) could magically sense their presence. In which case, he could escape his locked cage, unlock doors, float up the stairs, and somehow become 20 times larger just so he could murder them.