Didn’t you know people under the age of 50 cannot have mobility issues??? You have to be old enough to apply for wheelchairs.

Oh of course, but in this town, /no one/ is allowed to have them because the elderly don’t even use them (unless they are in nursing homes, bless their hearts). Actually, I think the acceptable age here is closer to 70. If you’re 50-60 and walk with a cane and can’t legally wear a rodeo trophy belt, you get serious side-eye.