Category: Uncategorized

blatantlyloquacious replied to your post:This weekend just keeps getting better. [[MOR] …

Oh man, I’m so sorry. 😦 You could try to keep the interaction/words to the absolute minimum you can so they won’t get angry, but that’s way easier said than done. If only there was a safe way you could just say “I can’t be around you…”

Thanks ^^ I appreciate the words so much.

Yeahh, they have no idea that what they do is hurtful and if they did, it would be everyone else’s fault for being “too sensitive and weak”. I feel really bad for everyone involved, honestly. I wish I knew what to do, but I guess all I can do for now is survive.

This weekend just keeps getting better.

I have to go to a family barbecue tonight and I am feeling sorry for myself/actually terrified I might try to revenge kill someone. I try to limit my exposure to these people now because they are poison I don’t care that they’re relatives. All they have ever done is tear down the people I actually do care about and tear us apart and threaten us. They’re the reason that my dad is so effectively trained in taking my power away, and they’re very good at it too. They treat my mom and my sis and I very badly, under this weird creepy veneer of “love” while talking about us behind our backs or even OPENLY like we’re worthless. (Other people aren’t lazy and worthless, only we are. Other people work really hard.) My dad rarely defends us at all. I just want to scream sometimes, particularly when they verbally attack my mom.

These people are the reason my brain broke several years ago (I had a breakdown complete with hallucinations). I’ve tried to limit my contact with them ever since my grandfather threatened my life if I ever “left my husband for any reason, even abuse, or decided to be gay”. And then the next weekend showed up on my front porch with a knife in his hand. I am NOT MARRIED geez.

I apparently have to go because I’m a part of this family. I don’t think anything would physically happen, but I also don’t think I can put up with any more emotional stuff right now. I have had emotional HELL the last few months. I don’t trust myself to behave like a good little “family member” forever.

I get enough of this at home. I don’t need the concentrated unabridged version :S

There’s not much point to barricading oneself in one’s room when one’s room is basically in exile in the dungeon in the first place, and no one actually wants to be down here.
But it’s kind of satisfying anyway.

I had a dream about this random guy named Thomas last night. We were fighting some kind of revolution against these…I don’t know what they were, mercenary soldier dudes hired by the government who were keeping a bunch of people hostage in an airport. Except that Tom and I and our crew of fighter people just happened to be there trying to break into the airport and steal something. Airplanes, IDK. We got in a shootout and ended up saving all the hostages, though I think all our guys died.

Sometimes I swing the refrigerator door closed and let it swing shut by itself, and do a little flourish thing with my hand like I used the Force or something, just for the fun of it. Today, I did that, but it didn’t close all the way, it just stopped partway and I was standing on the other side of the kitchen already when I waved my hand and it creaked shut anyway as I waved. Then I noticed my dad staring at me like 0.0 and I stared back at him and we just stared at each other for a while until he slowly went back to eating dinner like nothing had happened.

surly-cat:

spicyshimmy:

hellaillogical:

i bet whenever a trekkie has a kid they’re holding the newborn in their arms like “how many trek references can i put in your name without it being blatantly obvious”

‘class, say hello to our new transfer student, tiberius horatio ta’al redshirt dilithium chamber there be whales here’

This is why my husband let me name our children. They ended up with literary reference names instead, bwahaha!

One friend still won’t let me live down the childhood declaration that my first daughter shall be named Jadzia.