Tag: outlawthoughts

I had a dream last night where I went to a fast food place, but they wouldn’t let me get food until I’d participated in some kind of battle,
so I pulled out a lightcycle baton and rode circles around the other
guy.

Then I took off down the street, and there were pink flowers growing along the side of the street, and they glowed. It was really cool until the lightcycle stopped working.

I dreamed about the new BSG last night…I was arguing about religion with Roslin, and I think Tigh was there, but he was sitting waaaay off to the side like “neh, I can’t be bothered” and at one point I threatened to punch Roslin in the face? Which sounds about right. But still. WHY.

I keep waking up exhausted and I am relatively sure these damn intense nightmares are to blame. I try to sleep in, but I can’t, and I am just overwhelmed with fatigue anyway.
HOW DO I MAKE THEM STOP. I just want to feel like myself again and not shuffle around all day like I’m about to fall asleep standing up. :/ I thought once i got out of the stressful situation(s) and got the dreaded paperwork out of the way, I’d be able to sleep.

Sometimes there’s clues in the dreams themselves as to what the cause is, but this time…I was a long-lost princess returning to her land (which looked a lot like an arcade?) and some people believed I was her, others didn’t. Then I turned into a prince and the king killed my little brother in front of me because he had messed up the future with a magic sword. Also there was something about a ghost girl with black eyes and black hair.

I JUST DON’T GET IT BRAIN WHAT ARE YOU DOING.

I just remembered that I had this bizarre dream that I was in some kind of post-apocalyptic world, and my friends and I found our way to a haven of survivors and it was strangely just AWESOME. Like, everyone there was totally content and happy, and having a good time, and it was clean, and apparently this retro-futuristic airport place with a huge water park in the middle. And I figured out that it was a long-abandoned Chicago airport that had been flooded, converted to a water park, abandoned, and now was cleaned up and home to a bunch of people, and there was apparently a really awesome arcade/game room down in the lower levels so my friends and I started to head that direction. I looked outside of the window, and there was a GIANT pool in this kinda courtyard place where there used to be terminals and planes, and people were jumping off the building and swinging off of these amusement park thingies and swimming around, and an older guy walked up and talked to me about the game room downstairs, and he said that most of the games were gone now, though some were probably still there, but he didn’t seem to know he was in Chicago, so he was happy to hear that news. And then I woke up.

???

Nothing about that dream made sense, but at least it wasn’t a nightmare?

Searching for 30 year old costume pieces and realizing how ironic it is…they used a kind of Magic Marker back then and spray painted it gold for a costume part to keep production costs down. Nowdays, propmakers are having to

resin cast

Magic Markers because they can’t find enough. So costumers now have literally much nicer and more expensive versions of the costume pieces due to the passage of time, and we’re still having to make our costumes look like spray painted, hastily altered crap to be “screen accurate”.

This may be one reason I have such a difficult time convincing myself to push for screen accuracy. Variation allows me more wiggle room than an exact replica does. Plus I can’t afford the freakishly expensive pieces. $40 for a pin? Yikes!

Though I do admire the replicas, I also really like putting my own twist on a costume.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had nightmares and fears about looking at windows at night and seeing a face staring back at me.
Not jumping out of the shadows, just staring like they know me and they’ve always been there, watching.
Now I sit here, at night, looking at huge windows and the only face I see is my own…and I realize that I’ve got that same expression on my face that I’ve always been freaked out about.
It’s strangely comforting.

Like…really. I’m the scariest thing I can throw at me. Yeah, it’s a big world and bad things happen. But so much of my anxieties and fears are me holding onto emotional crap that isn’t even mine.